Buddy RIP 2006
Contents
Welcome
All Change
Club constitution
Nostrodamus – Last years result
Nostrodamus – 2006 predictions
RIP
Your bit
Ladies Page
A word from the Captain
Limericks by Adam
Welcome
Yes Fellow Nomads it’s that time of year again. The linseed oil is being taken from the cupboard, the whitener is being applied to the pads, our wives are letting out our whites because the winter beer has increased our waist sizes by 2 inches
23rd April sees the first game of the season. No easy route in this year, no it is straight into the league games. I am told the first friendly is actually scheduled for November 2010.
I am sure that all members (playing and non playing) will have an excellent season and that 2006 will as much of a success as 2005 was.
As I said at the AGM contributions to the Nomad News are required to make this a worthwhile so anything you have or want to say via the magic of the written word please e mail then to NomadNews@crawleygreennomadscc.co.uk
You will be pleased to know that I have managed to secure the services of the great Nostrodamus again this year. As you know he made a number of in depth predictions last year and later in this Nomads news we will look at his success rate ( very high I can tell you )
I will also be adding a limerick section (why ? I hear you ask. Because I can !!) and each Nomad news I will endeavour to come up with a new limerick.
See you all in the club for a beer or seven.
Andy
All change
This years AGM was for a number of different reasons very memorable.
As those of you who were there will already know there have been some major changes in Nomads officialdom for 2006
Our beloved Chairman and treasurer Fred has decided to hang up his clip board and retire from his position both as chairman and Treasurer.
As a direct result there have obviously been some significant changes at the club. There have also been some other changes as well. To see the changes click here
Club constitution
Crawley Green Nomads (formerly Luton nomads) have as far as I am aware never had an official club constitution. Now in order to be eligible for grants or indeed to get full recognition with the ECB the club needs to have one. In fact I am informed by the ECB after a call to them today that as far as they are concerned ALL cricket clubs should have an official club constitution.
I am therefore putting one together (about ½ done right now) and this will be put to the committee sometime in the next few weeks or so when I have finished it.
They aren’t rocket science and they don’t impede us as a club and what we do but it does give us a stronger footing going forward.
I will keep you all informed as this progresses
Nostrodamus - Last years results
Last year old nossie gave us the benefit of his brilliant mind and made a number of predictions as to what would happen in 2005.
So let’s see how he did:
1.Graham Hull will remain captain – yes
2. Yashpal will score the most amount of runs in the season – yes
3. Harold shipman will be bought back to life to captain the Carpenters Arms – I am told he did but doesn’t want anyone to know
4. Andy King will not break any part of his body this year (I know seems unbelievable but the mighty one has spoken) – true (but there again he only played twice then gave his gear away)
5. Steve Bruno will take a 5 for in a league match – Even Nossie can get one wrong
6. Shane Jones will leave BT and set up his own religious cult which will be imaginatively called the na na na sect –
Apparently he did but it was deemed illegal as he was using an old fishing technique to recruit members
7. Several members of the club will turn up dressed in Shane's new cult uniform (wellies, sowester and a false beard) claiming to have seen the light and the world if not really round but looks like a large haddock from the air – Hail all fish and fishy things
8. Bowler of the year will be Hully – if he wasn’t he should have been
9. Lord Lucan will turn up living in the new changing rooms and claim that he has lived
there all his life and can he open the batting – no one knows cos he is very good at hiding, just ask
Interpol
10. Julie Hull will not be at as many games after being led astray by Elaine King and will start to worship the God MATALAN – Just ask Hully its true
11. There will not be a tour in 2005 - true
12. Graham Shaw will reveal after a particularly drunken session that he is not really a South African accountant but is really a Julie Andrews impersonator from Colchester – lets not go there
13. Julie Andrews will turn up and state that after the Sound of Music she went to South Africa to become an accountant – Ditto
14. There will be an influx of material from the nomad posse for the Nomad news – oops two wrong nossie
15. Fred woodhouse will give an LBW in our favour – I saw one at least, I’m sure I did
16. We will all get drunk in 2005 at least once – obviously we did
17. Luke, Gary and Ian will get sober at least once in 2005 - 15th August at around 1.10pm I am told
18. The Nomads will win the league – OH YES
19. Darren Gough will pledge his allegiance to the club and play ( if selected) – he did but didn’t make the cut
20. I will stop writing crap - never
21. Hully will rest his injuries – another Nossie failure
I would say that was all in all a very successful nossie predictive season.
Nostrodamus - 2006 predictions
Lets see what he says first up for 2006:
1. Nomads will win the league again in 2006
2. They will come 2nd in the midweek league
3. The Hulls and the Kings will go to France this year
4. Robin Smith will be so impressed at the club he will join us as 12th man for next season
5. Several Nomads will contribute to the Nomad news in 2006 by sending stuff to
NomadNews@crawleygreennomadscc.co.uk
6. The Nomads will become a collective and hit the charts with a Gangster rap tune called “We may be Nomads but we can still bling for England” using a sample of “my old mans a dustman” as the melody
7. 2006 will see a first at Crawley Green. It will be a designated dog poo free zone
8. The alcohol will flow freely
9. The Nomads Teas will be better than anyone else’s again
10. The first two games will be called off due to excess snow on the pitch
RIP
As some of you may know we lost a long time member of the Nomads last year, Buddy. He has been with the club for as long as he has been born, running on the pitch (unlike his owner), pissing on the boundary markers (just like his owner) and generally keeping everyone amused whilst waiting to go in to bat. I am sure you will agree that he will be missed this year. Fortunately we do have the other old dog whose bark is as bad as his bite to keep us on our toes and for a small cheese sannie i am sure he will roll on his back and let you tickle his tummy.
Buddy RIP 2006
YOUR BIT
This is where you come in please send all contributions to:
NomadNews@crawleygreennomadscc.co.uk
Or give them to me in person. I am looking for (amongst other things)
Photos
Jokes
Comment
Off the wall match reports
Etc etc
Come on people this is your club, this is your web site, this is your Nomad news….USE
IT
Ladies Page
The Ladies in our club are what makes us stand out from the rest and they deserve to be recognised for this. So each month we will be featuring something for the ladies.
This month we look at the merits of Fairy washing up liquid against a leading supermarket brand.
After much industry research costing thousands of pound it has been officially declare that -
It doesn’t matter which washing up liquid is used because it a woman's job anyway.
Next month
How to choose a pair of rubber gloves that will last more than one season – (bet you can’t wait eh?)
A word from the Captain
"Hello. Hello. No not Lager – Smooth – I bloody hate lager"
Limericks by Adam
There was a new president
called Andy,
Who proclaimed he was always randy,
Then in a moment of madness,
His wife said with great sadness,
"That's true but he mostly uses his own
handy."
There was a club skipper called Hull,
Who has never been described as dull,
He has been a Nomad for years,
Drank his fair share of the beers,
Its like a marriage you would not annul.
There was a club secretary called Steve,
Who once told us why he decided to leave,
One day in a mess,
He wore his best dress,
And the thought is still making me heave.